If it weren’t for the third cancer hanging over my head, I would be a very happy soul. As it is I am just a happy soul. My roses are blooming. This is their big month and they are not disappointing. Gardening and puttering through the various chores of my household reminds me of my housewife days. Good days. I aspire to the Hobbit life. Mellow and satisfying. Life in my home.
I attend warm water pool classes at the Presbyterian Healthcare facility on Eubank. It is a long drive, but the classes are worth it. A comprehensive and aerobic workout that is manageable in the pool but not on land. Yesterday, I suddenly had a severe pain in my pelvic area that ran down the inside of my leg. Something new. Scared me. I thought about getting out but decided to lower my exercise level and see if it would pass. It did. I am no stranger to pain, back pain, joint pain and now this. Johnny Cash’s Peace in the Valley is sounding better all the time. Getting out of the pool is also painful and getting dressed is not much better. By the time I get to Trader Joe’s I have worked it out somewhat. Moving can be good for some pain, but not for others. My body is clear to me about the difference. During my hip replacement ordeal, I didn’t see the inside of a Trader Joe’s for six months. I refuse to miss this opportunity.
A coping skill that I have learned to conserve energy is to have my grocery bags carried out. Staff are always willing, and I always give them a few dollars. They protest but I insist, and I feel the better for it. It doesn’t sound like much but pushing the cart out, unloading the bags and returning the cart sap needed energy. It is wise to use the opportunity of help when it is available. Tipping isn’t necessary so if your budget is tight, don’t tip. They will still smile and are happy to be helpful.
I am in an RA flare. I have learned to manage. Well, I feel it is managing. Methotrexate(MTX) is a God send for me. Once I got past the initial side effects and on to the injections, it has been a maintenance drug for me. Plaquenil complements the MTX. Tramadol and Gabapentin help. Medrol gets me through flares along with cannabis cream for my feet and hands. I always wear custom orthotic shoes. I sleep on a heated mattress pad, summer and winter. I do all that I can.
The serous uterine cancer that is presently in my body is also genetic especially if you have a close relative with colon cancer. My brother died of cancer of the appendix. Of course, Tamoxifen is the main culprit. I always figured I would have another cancer, a new one. I had not even heard of this cancer. I believe that there is no point in worrying as the thing you are worried about is not the thing that is lurking in the bushes, a thing most dreadful and a thing waiting to attack.
My RA, my CA and I are heading back to the garden. Time to move one plant into a bigger pot and put a new plant in the old pot. Back to living in the now. A very good place to be.
Yes, Mary, live in the now. Worrying doesn’t solve a thing. We’ve decided to plan a trip for June, long after my husband was supposed to de dead and gone. Enjoy your garden!
Mary I am so glad for the updates. I know it takes energy. Wish we lived closer. I hope at some point you will read my novel, Shatter My Heart. We spoke of all the things related to illness Dx etc so many time would appreciate your feedback.
I have had a week of horrible bouts of pain spasms and cramping. In a way I wish I could share these episodes and how I get through them like you do. My training as a psychologist just keeps saying not to be so open. Still it does a lot of good I am sure. Please let yourself experience what you need to. Some of us understand or at least come close to understanding the enormity of what you are going through and how you are managing it all.
Planted 2 tomato plants today. The garden is sanctuary. Blessings. Thelma
Wish we could do lunch before my chemo kicks in.