All posts filed under: RA journal

Mary’s RA Journal

Mary’s RA Journal May 2021 Year nine I was diagnosed with RA eight years ago. The onset seemed sudden. But was it? My RA started in my feet. I was one of the 20% whose symptoms started in their feet. My internist thought I was too old to have RA. He seemed to think my feet were fine. As recent as eight years ago, rheumatologists did not routinely examine a patient’s feet. They believed RA started in the small joints of the hands. Examining the feet was inconvenient. Examining the feet took too muctook to much time. My symptoms increased. My pain became severe. I was very sick. As a victim of an unresponsive healthcare system, I finally sought relief in the ER. I was fortunate to be seen by a knowledgeable doctor who treated me and sent me to a rheumatologist. My career as a rheumatoid arthritis patient began. I spent years on methotrexate which helped me about 50%. I tried most of the biologics in between being treated for three different cancers.  Orencia …

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RA Journal Progression

Mary’s Arthritis Journal May 8, 2021 I have always been amazed by those who can work through illness. I once had a friend who had a chronic leukemia. During episodes of chemo, she found that she could not sleep. Instead of watching endless Netflix, she spent her nights researching and writing a successful blog on ghost stories. She used her down time to her advantage. I am not like her. I wallow. I vegetate. My brain seems to stop working. When my rheumatoid arthritis is sending inflammatory messengers throughout my body, when pain is attacking every moveable joint, when I have depleted my stores of coping, I retreat. My body feels sick. My research goes on hold as does my writing. My mind is stuck in a quagmire. There is only a wish to escape and a hope that there will be an end, and in that end, I will be alive again. I will be okay. My flares are becoming something to be feared. My ankles and my toes remain swollen. It is very …

Managing RA

I am an optimist. But I am also a realist. When faced with a painful situation, I sometimes  dance around the issue for a few turns. Then, painful, or not, I face whatever it is,  deal with it and then do my best to move on. Stiff upper lip and all that. Each time I was diagnosed with a new cancer I did just that. I never once thought why me. I had the surgery, the chemo, the radiation. Suffered through it. Recovered for the most part and moved on. I felt that none of those three cancers would ever return as the treatments were brutal to my body and left nothing unaffected. My method of handling problems worked with cancer. Then I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis almost eight years ago. RA is a painful, debilitating and a  lifelong disease. It is a disease that must be dealt with daily. RA will not go away just because I am weary of living with it. It is forever. It is not a problem to be …

Life is good

Christmas is surrounding us. Thoughtful considerations given. Small kindnesses. Music. Good chocolate. Desserts. Hugs. Packages in shiny paper. And the knowledge I am cared for. I feel fortunate. I have loved ones to share the holidays and although I am a little wobbly at times, I am able to do my favorite activities for the season. I have had past years where I have felt frightfully alone. I have been fearful for my life. I have been fearful for my future. But now my heart has settled down. I know better who I am.  I feel satisfied with myself. I accept my place in the world and I am grateful for it. Life is good. My son and I took Francis for a picture with Santa at Petco. We were first. Francis growled at a young French Bull dog and then sat on Santa’s lap like they were old friends. Another good memory.

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Disabling RA

One of the big pleasures I have is watching the full moon make its way up and over the mountain. I see it from my patio doors as I am making dinner. Lately, it not only is a big, full moon but also a beautiful, warm yellow. When I first see it, the moon  is just peering over the top edge of the mountain. Then it seems to sit on the edge of the mountain top just before continuing  its journey up into the night sky. A moment in time. I was thinking of good things to distract from the pain I have in my joints and the nagging fear in the back of my mind that I am becoming more disabled with each passing day. My RA was diagnosed seven years ago in January. Since then, I have had three cancers and a hip replacement. Most of that time I have been on methotrexate, mostly injectable. It has slowed the progress of the RA. It could be worse. I’ve been on almost all the …