A side effect of having flares is their random quality. One day a person with RA may be out dancing with the girls. The next week she may not able to join them because she is not well. Repeat. And then repeat. Is she neurotic? Her friends may be thinking. They stop asking her to go with them.

Another young mother with RA  may ask her husband or her mother to help more with the children when she is having a flare that puts her flat. She was able to explain the severe and random nature of rheumatoid arthritis flares. Her husband and her mother had come to understand the severe and random nature of RA and were happy to help her more when she needed it.

So, this is what a person with RA has to deal with.  You may be spending a large share of your time in severe pain. You may have serious doubts about your future. People will still look at you and say you look healthy to them.  And although saddled with a serious disease you are still required to prove yourself.